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From the Heart: Hearts to Art Impacts Future for Former Camper

When applying for an elite educational college access  summer program, applicants were asked to write an essay describing a personal experience or accomplishment, how they would use this experience to help others, and what the experience taught them about themselves. From former camper to current Junior Counselor at Hearts to Art, Noelle Hutchinson shares her story.

Here is their essay:

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When I was 11 years old, my father died of a broken heart. It was 3 weeks after the funeral of his grandmother, who died of colon cancer. She was like a second mother to him and had a large impact on the man he had become. My father, Kenneth Hutchinson, was 35 years old and had been suffering from a heart condition called cardiomyopathy, which is a disease that makes it difficult for the heart to deliver blood to the body. After learning of his grandmother’s passing, he grieved heavily for 3 weeks, weeping and rarely sleeping. He kept saying he felt like a part of him had died. The day of his grandmother’s funeral, he sang and spoke eloquently about her. Later that evening, he died a sudden death.

My father was ‘a national voice for college access’, as described by the article done about him by the Chicago Tribune after he passed. He devoted his life to assisting low income, first generation, minority students across the United States gain college access. First, he did this as Director of College Counseling at Urban Prep Charter Academy for Young Men. Under his leadership, Urban Prep secured 6 consecutive years of 100% college acceptance for its senior class, 95% college enrollment, 18 Gates Scholars, 12 Posse Scholars and over 12 million dollars in scholarships and grants. That’s how my father earned his nickname ‘100% Hutch.” After Urban Prep, my dad continued supporting college counselors throughout the country as Director of College Initiatives for the Cristo Rey Network.

To many people, he was a mentor, a father figure, a teacher, and a world changer. To me, he was just Daddy. Daddy, who took me to the thrift store, played games with me, prayed over me, helped me with my homework, and sang with me. Daddy, who held my hand crossing the street. Daddy, who would struggle trying to do my hair and eventually say “alright that’s enough” and put a hat on me. Daddy, who never gave up on our family. As his daughter, I was not fully aware of all he had done for others, only who he was to me: Daddy. When Daddy was gone, I was confused. Despite him being there to help so many, he was no longer there to help me.  I learned that when you lose a parent at such a young age, not only do you grieve what you’ve lost, you grieve what you will never have.

After the loss of my father, I had so much trouble relating to others and making friends. I felt alienated. Watching fathers playing with their kids during ‘Dad’s Day’, not being able to fully participate in Daddy-Daughter dances, not taking part in conversations about which parent does what – because I only had one. Eventually, I found a community during the summer of 2019 when I attended my first session of Hearts to Art Camp. Hearts to Art is a performing arts summer camp for children ages 7-14 who have experienced the death of a parent. In attending, I learned I wasn’t alone, became friends with other kids who shared my experience, and who felt the same feelings I felt. After my 3 siblings and I continued to attend Hearts to Art each summer, I was inspired to become a Junior Counselor.

Junior Counselors are former campers who are selected to become peer leaders and use our own experiences to cultivate a safe and empowering environment for the campers. During my first year as a Junior Counselor, I developed relationships with campers, related on a personal level, and I was allowed to just be myself. We related on a deep level, were understood by, and understood people from completely different backgrounds. I learned through my experience how much I enjoy and desire to work with children. In the campers, I saw a younger me. The me that missed Daddy. Seeing this allowed me to open up, knowing I could be a safe space for those little me’s.

The way I view life is impacted greatly by both of my parents’ accomplishments. Their successes and legacies as first-generation college students motivate me to do all I can. As a result, I am currently ranked number 1 of 157 the sophomore class in my school and I have a 4.75 GPA. Although I am doing well academically, I know everything in life will not be easy as I graduate high school, graduate college, and walk down the aisle without my dad. Yet, Sam Taylor-Wood once said, “I think you only see experiences as defining moments with distance.” I believe this is true because as I look back, I can see that without my dad passing, I would have never been in a position to attend Hearts to Art Camp and to discover my passion for working with children. Specifically, children who are dealing with grief and/or are from less fortunate situations.

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Noelle has been accepted into the program and going to be a junior this coming school year and hopes to continue pursuing a career helping children.